On today’s episode I have Charity Lighten, telling us how we can get unstuck in our business and make our businesses better without the stress.
IE 289: How to Get Unstuck in Your Business & Life with Charity Lighten
My guest’s name today is Charity and she’s a change coach over at Embrace Change.
A change coach is a life coach that actually forces you to not just reflect on your life, but to take action.
To make changes where you need to make those changes, but sometimes we get a little bit stuck and so having a change coach can be helpful.
How do we know that we are stuck?
Charity thinks that it’s one of those little things where you kind of would say, how do you know you have a sliver in your hand?
It only bothers you sometimes you can ignore it when you want to, but when you get really still and you get really quiet, you’re like, you know what? I think there might be a sliver in my hand.
It’s kind of the same thing where you’re like, I can tell maybe you’re just off, if you’re not feeling your best, or you’re just not in the element of flow and energy.
So it’s really quite different for everybody, but the easiest way is just, it’s that interpersonal connection with yourself to ask yourself…
Am I living an optimal life? The way that I want to live? And if not, maybe I’m stuck somewhere.
Do our personal and business lives overlap and cause us to think we’re stuck in one, but we’re really stuck in the other?
Charity feels like in general, we are whole beings, where there’s this holistic environment.
So as much as maybe we want to separate our personal from our business or these types of ideas in reality, how do you do that?
You know, we are who we are all of the time. We can put on different hats and we can put on different roles but in our core, we are who we are.
Charity used to do some leadership training and she would tell people how you live is how you lead. You can’t separate, you can’t live one way and then think, okay, well, I can try to pretend in a different way.
So the idea that we’re stuck in our regular life or in our business, they’re one in the same. A
There’s certain things that just affect us so deeply.
We can’t really separate them. Charity has yet to meet anybody that doesn’t deep down, want a life of excellence. Everybody wants that.
And what’s really interesting to me too, is we all have this common feeling that we are meant for this greater potential.
It’s so neat for me to be like, oh, you know, I think I’m not always living up to my potential and you start talking to everybody.
Everybody feels like they want to be living this best life, and really you can’t really separate it from business or from your personal life.
It’s so all encompassing. So all you can really do is essentially treat yourself as one entity and go, where are the areas of my life that I’m not living optimally and how do I get there?
How do we determine which part of our lives needs to get unstuck first?
That’s really not as easy as we think, some people go, “oh, I know it’s easy. I’ve been eating like crap. So I feel like crap. I know I need to start there”.
For other people, it’s not as easy.
In fact, once Charity went to her chiropractor, and said her neck was killing her.
Well, he goes into this little part of her back, he starts messing with this middle part of her back.
He touches this part in the middle shoulder, kind of up her back and she can feel it penetrating up into her neck.
There’s three foundational pillars for getting unstuck.
One, like I mentioned, is physically, it houses who we are, our spirit, our energy, all these things.
So I would start, “Hey, how are you doing physically? How are you taking care of yourself?” you know, sleep, movement, nutrition.
The other two pillars would be spiritual and emotional, We are spiritual beings, we’re emotional beings.
And if when I’m working with somebody like, “okay, well, I don’t know that that’s necessarily any of those categories.” Then I can move on to the next level.
And in Charity’s coaching course, she’s got a change academy course where you go into 10 different categories where every day you kind of look and go “which of these categories does my spirit or my mind want to work on today”.
And that could be something like your love, your romance, that could be your finances.
Charity has to have a little bit of adventure in her life. Like, if she has nothing to look forward to on the calendar, she will sometimes start to feel a little bit off.
It doesn’t need to take up all of my time and all my energy.
So it’s not quite as easy as identifying and that’s where real self-awareness, knowing yourself, knowing your personality, knowing your tendencies is helpful.
Or having a sounding board, having a coach.
Charity is a verbal processor. She did not know this about herself for two decades.
When she learned, she realized “Oh, that’s where my girlfriends are handy, Or my husband is handy or a coach is handy that can kind of help you go, okay. Let’s work through this today”.
Are there ways to check in with ourselves to recalibrate before we feel stuck?
Charity is a big believer in habits and change.
Charity really tries to encourage people to get into the habit every single day of a daily check-in.
But this can look different for different people, Charity is a left-brained type of personality.
So a notebook and a pen and a list of things is really helpful for her.
For some people that can be some sort of meditation, prayer, or self-reflection, but it’s really about intentionally getting in tune with who you are and who you want to be.
We live in a crazy chaotic world where billions of dollars are at play for your attention, for your distraction and want to get your attention and to keep it.
In order to fight off that a little bit, you have to be just really intentional.
She coaches people on something called the 10 minute morning momentum, in that 10 minutes in the morning, there is an element of self-reflection in terms of what do I need to work on today? What do I want to achieve today? Which categories are calling my name today?
It’s really a little bit of a balancing act and Charity has a visual of those tape measures that you can pull out and then you can push the button and it brings it back.
She feels like if she goes too long without doing this intentional self-reflection, her tape measure will begin to pull back, maybe not in the direction that she wants it to go.
She wants to pull it back and do a daily reset and be like “okay, what are the projects that I want to work on?”
It’s these small little things that take less than 10 minutes, but it really just is about being intentional.
You need to find those cracks before they become these mountains of issues in our lives.
Charity has 25 tips that help people be more productive, more efficient, and help them get unstuck. It’s easy and it’s free.
You can connect with Charity on Instagram for more information.